Random thoughts from Courtney Lane…

I’m in the middle of watching the final of the three Presidential debates and I realize that I may have made a mistake by deciding to throw back a Kamikaze every time John McCain calls us his "his friends". Time will tell if I also made an error by pledging to down the whole pitcher if he says "my fellow prisoners" again…

Being female is the only thing that’s adequately prepared me for the way the Mets keep disappointing me…

I feel I have enough foreign policy experience to be Vice President because I can watch Cricket matches while sunning myself on our new patio…

Is it wrong to love your Oncologist?

Congratulations MoJo Shepancy! (They know who they are)…

I came up with a cool, trendy name for Sarah Palin’s future grandchild – Shotgun!

The difference between a pit bull and a hockey mom? A pit bull is smart enough not to indulge their kids by allowing them to pick a sport that requires their parents to buy a freakishly large Yukon XLT just to lug all that soon-to-be-outgrown and never-used-again equipment which, by the way, is too heavy for their kids to even carry themselves. Forget this overly expensive, unbelievably time-consuming "sport" -- throw a ball, teach them to bring it back to you, give them a cookie. Problem solved.

I’m giving up on McCain and "my friends", he’s only said it twice. I’m going with "Joe the Plumber" now. I need this to end soon and twenty six shots ought to be enough to put me out of my misery.

How many Libertarians does it take to organize a rally?
(Don’t answer that… Libertarians organizing is just too obvious a premise for a joke. Sorry.)

Final thought… A dog shouldn’t talk about being put out of it’s own misery. I know, crazy, right?